Monday, March 2, 2015

Published 9:30 AM by with 4 comments

The 3 Things You Learn When You Step Outside of Yourself

So....I recently had the opportunity to facilitate two training sessions with about 100+ people. While it was my intention  to just go in, go through my PowerPoint and spend the rest of the weekend in my hotel room relaxing and catching up on some reading and writing. Of course, I don't have to tell you, the weekend didn't go quite that way.  Pretty early on, things went left.

In the past, I would have pitched a complete and utter fit, blasting any and every one who failed to do their job, leading to my point of inconvenience. "You need my help?" "That is not what I came here to do!"  I don't know if it was the balmy 70 degree weather, lack of sleep and the inability to fight or just maturity... but as more and more requests for help came, I simply saw each "situation" as an opportunity.  Instead of seeing the inconvenience, I just saw each person in their need and my ability to help.  I ended up being so grateful for my skills and abilities and the recognition of my personal growth. I also learned a few things, and I wouldn't be me if I didn't here it goes.

The 3 Things You learn when You Step Outside of Yourself:

1. Your ability to be a blessing to others is only surpassed by the blessing you receive by willing to be one in the first place -- people have alot of stuff going on, when you can help you should help...and don't make it a big production.

2. Stepping out of self also means stepping out of stress -- when we put down our mess, we put down the stress that goes with it. When you are focused on the task(s) presented for your handling, it generally consumes -- if only for a few minutes, leaving little room in your head or time on your hands to worry about anything else.

3. Some things just aren't that serious -- I am a firm believer that the world will and can stop if I have just the right issue or concern. Fortunately for you and me, I am alone in this opinion. There are folks that have issues far greater than mine and I cannot be consumed with my own "shiggity" that I can't see that others have it too. More importantly, I cannot be so distracted with mine that I cant help somebody else.

There you go...that's it...go forth and be a blessing!

Peace, Joy & Love,
Michelle H.


  1. I just don't think it applies to black people anymore than others. I think back over my life and dozens of people who have hired me, mentored me, taught me, or believed in me come to mind. They were more often than not people of color. Even coming up, i can remember drug dealers and other "criminals" encouraging me to do the right thing, keep going to school, and to make something of myself. There is this stereotype that other cultures are more united and do more to help themselves than blacks do but for me it is just a stereotype.

  2. Being open and transparent can be difficult. To do so requires vulnerability which many are uncomfortable with. However, in order to develop deep relationships, its necessary to expose ourselves. As a counselor and a coach being open when needed helps my clients address their own personal pain, but encourages them to break through to higher levels and achieve greater success. I applaud you for taking the first step in acknowledging the issue by writing this post and developing a plan to improve in this area. Keep it up!

  3. Kudos to you for opening up and finding your healthy normal. Like everything, it's a process and it sounds like you are well on your way.

  4. Great piece.